DAY 15: KAIDIE HAS A NEW SUPERPOWER FOR 2010: LAUNCHING THE MIND over MATTER PLUGIN aka THE M&M PLUGIN (TM). Apologies, you can’t download it – BUT I will share it at my first real-life appearance on 20:00hrs 26 January in Villa Straeuli, Winterthur, Switzerland. So, COME!
Being that time of the year when we come up with new resolutions in desperate bids to triumph over evil habits, I have been terribly busy with my Winter assignment, that of coming up with a new superpower. Being already quite perfect as I am, what do I need? That was a tough one that had my mind all bogged down. However, today I invented one. Although it remains a state secret, I would like to reward you, my loyal Dear Readers of my Life 3.0 travel blog, by sharing with you the fruits of my labour here: I have willed myself a brand new plugin*, in time for the New Year: that of the Mind Over Matter (M&M) superpower.
* A brief note about superpowers of the 21st century, for the benefit of you, mere mortals: We post-911 superheroes no longer enter phone booths to put on crimson briefs over blue tights. Pink is better, but faster still are plugins (no learning curve!!). Simply switch them on, and I am ready to save the worlds.
Above: low-res photo of Kaidie's high-res brains (from my Blackberry).
My M&M plugin (NO, I am not abbreviating it to ‘MoM’ because I deplore all you righteous simpletons Freudian/Lacanian/Oprah/Jerry Springer/Psychobabble Crunchy Nutheads trying to read into all these and NO, I am not in denial so kindly piss off) is most formidable, as with all of my other superpowers. I installed my M&M plugin this afternoon during my run at Regents Fark.
Allow me to explain, my Dear Readers. My right ankle was in a sort of a strain the first 4km of my 15km run yesterday. I was nearly limping. This afternoon, again, the right ankle was moaning in a dull tone – and this time for more than 6km! So Kaidie was presented with 2 choices: 1) ignore the moans of my sissy ankle, or 2) listen to my sissy ankle, give up the run, walk (slowly) home (in shame).
It was a no-brainer. Although I do not own any Triumph bra or panties for they are too momsy (SHUT UP again you psychobabblecrunchynuts), I am a never-say-die (until 09.09.2012 that is) Triumphant Triumphalist. I am no chicken! For, I am a hamster, remember! NOW get that! In Life 3.0, there is a 3rd choice: my brilliantly fertile mind got working, and there and then, at Regents Fark, I invented the M&M plugin, which I uploaded and installed immediately. I do not mean to boast (with my 3rdlifer modesty and terrific solo-auto upbringing) but with the M&M superpower, the rest of my 15km run today was chicken feed. No ankle strain or anything mundane like that, or rather, if there was,any, it did not matter. The M&M plugin WORKS and is RUNNING WELL (pun intended)!
For those who lack imagination, I have decided to help you (this being the oh-so-jolly season of giving and sharing, afterall!) I have taken a photo of my brains (please see above). The superpower plugins are the bits sticking up on the left (more to come). As clearly illustrated here, my mind is quite fertile, as I am of a fertile age (although, nothankyouverymuch, we are against reproduction philosophically – Kaidie is extremely principled as [self-]righteous, if you didn’t already know) – but of course, if you recall the circumstance of my birth, which was the cesspool of poo, my primary source of nutrients.
Oh goody, I’m really into the festive mood now.
Eadam
A belated Merry Christmas Kaidie from Life 0.5. I wanted to send you a Christmas card, but I left it too late for Life 1.0’s Royal Mail (or is that Life 3.0’s Noyal Nail?).
This is pretty cool, I don’t know how the weather is in Nondon, here the snow has all but disappeared but I almost uninstalled my ankle while taking the dog out for a walk earlier. Why don’t you get a dog? Just for Christmas?
And I don’t think I answered your question as to where my name goes after Zadam. Well it goes wherever it wants to, of course, but I reckon it’ll probably do Greek for a bit.
Dec 26, 2009 @ 19:26
3rdlifekaidie
Dear Edam,
Merry belated Xmas to you too! Thank you for your intention and non-action of sending a card. Thank you for your advice as well. I will put it up, for the next Xmas!
Don’t you think however that dogs have been over-anthromorphised? If I needed a dog, I am better off finding a furry friend who wags his tail. I know a couple. Or, unless its a large St Bernard, like my good friend Heidi’s!
I much prefer a hippo as a pet, but my dwelling is too small. Fish is great – specifically cod or salmon, and I can have fresh sashimi when hungry… Being a Nondoner, I think it would be appropriate to get an elegant Critish Clue Cat (C3), which is said to not like water, ‘but will accept the indignity of a bath provided it is done with tender loving care’. I will train my C3 to be my Sancho Panza in my quest – perhaps s/he can sniff out and meow when s/he finds The Meaning of Life 3.0!
Any donations?
x Kaidie
Dec 30, 2009 @ 00:30